Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Crossing the Dolphin-ish Line

Scene: Seaworld after hours. Dolphin trainer Terry Vatchet is talking to himself by the dolphin pool

Terry Vatchet: (to himself) Sigh. I wish my life were more exciting like in that movie with the giant robot bear. I mean, yes I am a very gifted dolphin trainer. Everyone always says: my awards and trophies speak for themselves. But still, is there something else out there? Is there a way I can use my dolphin training techniques to not only make my life exciting but to also make a fortune and live a life of glamour?

Donny the Dolphin: Reee-eee-reee-eee chirp-chirp Ree-eee?

Terry: I can’t understand you, Donny. (moans) You only speak dolphin.

(Donny the Dolphin swims over to the garbage area of the pool and uses his bottle-nose to bring over a bit of wet newspaper)

Terry: It’s a newspaper article. What’s this? It says that Mammoth NASCAR is super popular and they are thinking of an underwater spin-off where people race sharks.

Donny the Dolphin: Chirp-chirp Reee-eee-reee-eee!

Terry: I still have no idea what you’re saying. Anyway, while this article is certainly exciting, Donny, you’re not a shark. You’re a dolphin.

(Donny the Dolphin swims over to a metal pole in the pool and even though it takes him awhile, he bites it in half)

Terry: Holy shit, Donny!

(Donny’s dolphin mouth is bleeding, but it’s not too bad and for him the demonstration is worth it. He shows this by swimming in circles a couple of times)

Terry: If you can do that, well…. maybe with a little make-up…maybe people will think you’re a shark and you can race in the shark racing I read about in the wet newspaper you brought me!

(Donny the Dolphin rolls his eyes but nods enthusiastically)

Terry: Okay. We’re going to dress you up like you’re a small shark. But one question, Donny.

Donny the Dolphin: What?

Terry: Can you swim?

Donny the Dolphin: Reee-eee-chirp-chirp- eee-reee!

(Donny the Dolphin swims from one edge of the pool to another)

Terry: That’s too slow, Donny. Too slow. Someone is going to have to train you if you’re going to win, if we’re going to be famous, if we’re going to take shark-racing by storm.

(Terry thinks.)

Terry: I’ll train you!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Good work here-- it certainly would be thrilling to watch a dolphin duke it out with some of the world's fastest racing sharks. But is it really that believable? What kind of make-up will they use? And most importantly, why on earth does the dolphin want to give up his fun life of eating fish and jumping so he can race with bloodthirsty sharks after training for what I suspect will be months? And most importantly, how will the dolphin breath during the underwater race when it doesn't have gills? Just some questions I think need to be answered as your screenplay progresses-- other wise super great job. Way better than some of the crap I read on other screenplay websites.

Anonymous said...

Bad news, humanG-- "Crossing the Dolphin-ish Line" is actually already a movie.

Sorry to be the bubble burster

Anonymous said...

Here's a thought-- why not make Dolphin Trainer Terry Vachets ex-girlfriend a dolphin linguisitics researcher for the aqautic branch of the NSA-- then Vatchet and the girlfriend (give her a sciencey name like Margaret or Lilometi) get back together when Terry needs to understand what the dolphin is saying. That will be a great human element. Romance is popular in movies, to say the least.