Saving Time

It is the year 70 Million B.C. Cave men rule the world. Cave man Manosaur should be happy. He has 5 children and 1 loving cave wife. Still, his life is empty and unfulfilling and he doesn’t know why. Then, one day, as he out hunting for raptors, he sees a sudden flash. He goes to investigate, and he finds a large metal box.

Manosaur: What is this?

(Manosaur knocks on the box and suddenly the box opens. Derrick, a man from the year 2009 steps out)

Derrick: Where is Jesus?

Manosaur: Who is Jesus?

Derrick: “Who’s Jesus?” Oh no! What year is this?

Manosaur: What do you mean?

Derrick: The unthinkable has happened! I’ve gone too far back in time!

Manosaur: Back in time? Where are you from?

Derrick: Not where, my caveman friend. When. I’m from the year 2009 A.D.

Manosaur: But that’s impossible! That’s over 70 million years from now!

Derrick: Precisely. And unfortunately, it was a one-way trip. I sacrificed living in the future to meet Jesus.

Manosaur: But why? What’s so great about Jesus?

Derrick: Hmmmm….What is your name, cave man?

Manosaur: Manosaur. And may I ask your name?

Derrick: I’m Derrick. And Manosaur? I think I can help you.

Through the rest of Act 1 and all of Act 2, Derrick teaches Manosaur the word of the Bible. He tells him about the great flood that will occur, and about Samson and David and Goliath and most beautiful of all, he tells Manosaur about Jesus and how after 70 million years, he will release Manosaur from the tortures of hell. Through it all, Manosaur is enraptured, and is saddened only by the fact that he will not live long enough to meet Jesus.

Derrick: I know what you mean, Manosaur. I know exactly what you mean. I wanted to meet Him too, so bad that I gave up all of the comforts of the year 2009 in order to do so. But it wasn’t meant to be. Still, even if I couldn’t meet Him, I’m glad I was given the opportunity to bring His word to you and your cave family.

Manosaur: Look out, a triceratops!

(A triceratops runs towards Derrick and Manosaur stops it by throwing a spear through its eye and into its small brain)

Derrick: You…you saved my life, Manosaur.

Manosaur: That’s nothing. You saved my soul.

Derrick: I guess I did.

Manosaur: Derrick, do you ever wonder that you’ll change the future by being in the past?

Derrick: No.

Manosaur: See that baby raptor? Kill it for me. I want to see something.

(Derrick steps on the baby raptor and kills it and then as soon as he does he has long sharp teeth and pink curly hair)

Manosaur: You look hilarious!

Derrick: But as far as I know, I’ve always looked like this!

Manosaur: Exactly. Anyway, let’s talk about Jesus.

Derrick: Who?

Manosaur: Jesus! The son of God! The Jesus who’ll die for your sins in 70 million years!

Derrick: I don’t know what you’re talking about. All I know is that I came back in time to play baske–

Manosaur: No! You came back in time to see Jesus! But then you stepped on a baby raptor and now you don’t even know who He is!!

Derrick: Teach me.

Manosaur: I will. It all starts with this book. (Manosaur begins reading from the Bible)

Derrick: This…this seems right.

Manosaur preaches the Word to Derrick, and it is strange because originally Derrick taught Manosaur. When Manosaur finally finishes teaching Derrick about Jesus, suddenly Derrick's hair and teeth go back to normal and the baby raptor springs back to life.

Derrick: Manosaur, I might have saved your soul, but you saved my life AND my soul.

Manosaur: It was nothing. Come on. I want to show you this thing I invented. I call it “fire.”

Derrick: (laughs) Fire, huh? I think I’ve heard of it. It’s going to be big.

Manosaur: (laughs)

Credits